All posts by momopolize@gmail.com

Stressgiving

Thanksgiving is a day of giving thanks, but it can also be a day of giving stress.  The grocery shopping, the cleaning, the annoying Uncle, the complicated pie recipes (see, I told you to use my recipe!!)

I did actually bake a cheesecake and cupcakes, to distract from the store-bought pies.  I will post photos at some point…just to prove I am capable of baking SOMETHING, just not pies.

To make this an “official” Thanksgiving post:  I am thankful to have so many things to be thankful for that I don’t have time to write them all.  And you are too busy today to read them all anyway.

But you’re not too busy to look at pictures.  When the day starts giving you more stress than thanks, I hope these pictures will make you smile.

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!

__________________________________________________________________

I am thankful for my readers that vote for me for silly contests.  Just a couple of quick clicks, but it means a lot.  Because apparently I like to try to win things…

Voli’s Housewife Heroes contest: https://www.facebook.com/volispirits/app_489717107739723

Circle of Moms top 25 family bloggers  (this link takes you directly to me.  No scrolling required this time):  http://www.circleofmoms.com/blogger/momopolize?blogroll_id=84

Oppan Costco Style

OMGosh you guys!  I think I must be a viral sensation.  I went to Costco today and like almost EVERY cart had used my pie recipe.  (If you missed my pie recipe yesterday, click here.)  I couldn’t believe it.  That means they ALL read my blog and ran right out to try what I suggested, right?  I am so excited!  I mean, if that many people from just MY Costo read my blog, then just think how many read it across the country!!!

Some people even made their own adjustments to the recipe, substituting Pumpkin or Pecans for the Apples.  Pure genius.  I always suspected my readers are brilliant.

I think I even heard a few singing the following song…

Hey, Bloggy Lady. Op, Op, Op, Oppan Costco Style.

Hey, Bloggy Lady. Op, Op, Op Oppan Costco Style.

Look out Gangnam Style, I think Costco Style is the next big thing.  My pie-in-the-sky is within reach.

Now I just need some cool dance moves.  “Bake the Cake” anyone?

_______________________________________________________________________

What’s that you’re saying??  All the people buying pies at Costco had nothing to do with following my recipe??  Or reading my blog??  Oh.

I guess I need to eat humble pie.  Anyone have a recipe??

Photo: imgon.net

_______________________________________________________________________

Psssst, you can still vote…

Housewife Heroes finalists (story on second page, Angela M.) https://www.facebook.com/mobileprotection#!/volispirits/app_489717107739723

Circle of Moms (scroll waaaaay down the page, I just joined so am at #97.  Vote so I don’t look so pathetic at the bottom. lol)  http://www.circleofmoms.com/top25/Top-25-Family-Blogs-By-Moms-2012#_

Easy As What???

Confession time:  I have never made a pie.  Ever.  The thought intimidates me.  I mean, check out the recipe at the bottom of this post!  It’s not a recipe, it’s a short novel.  (I put the recipe at the bottom because it is so long, I knew no one would read that far so anything I wrote after the recipe would be pointless.)

Where the heck did the term “easy as pie” come from anyway?  The recipe below says the time to make it is 2 hours and it serves 10-12.  They have it backwards.  It would take me 10-12 hours to make and, in my house, would serve 2.  If I’m lucky.

I like my recipe better.

Put It On The Table Apple Pie Recipe

Difficulty Level:  Easy as Pie Really Easy

Time: 2 hours

Yield: 10-12 boys with enormous appetites

Ingredients:

  • Costco membership card
  • Car
  • $15 cash.  Note:  Substituting credit instead of cash not recommended.  Debit substitution will yield better results, but cash is best.

Directions:

  1. Drive to nearest Costco.
  2. Display your membership card, along with a big smile.
  3. Visit all sample tables.  This is the most time consuming step and should be eliminated if you substituted credit.
  4. Choose apple pie with the least perfect latice crust on top (for believability).
  5. Remove plastic covering and price tag.
  6. Sprinkle face with flour.
  7. Add half-baked excuses when asked for recipe.

We are on dessert duty for Thanksgiving dinner with Jim’s family.  I’d like to be adventuresome and try my hand at pie making (NOT the one below though).  However, I’m pretty sure I will stick to my tried-and-true recipe above.  I have a similar recipe for “Put It On The Table Sheet Cake.”  But I may actually bake one of those because, in comparison to the pie recipe instruction manual, making a cake will be a piece of ca…oh, nevermind.

_______________________________________________________________

 

Don’t Talk To Strangers. Unless You Are Asking Them For Help.

Hopefully I can have a bottle of vodka to wash down the hypocrite.

Let me ask once again for you to vote for me to win a trip to NYC based on my “self-less” behavior.  Yes, that’s right.  I’ve asking you to help me win a self-indulgent, self-serving, self-involved prize for my…self.  Doesn’t sound so self-less.  Selfish is more like it.

I cringe every time I post a “please vote for me” plea for this contest.  It just feels weird since I was initially notified about entering the contest because Voli Light saw my post about “Momopoly: The Real Game Of  Life” and using monopoly game concepts like Chance and Community Chest to foster fellowship and help those in need.

But I guess this time I feel like I am the one in need.   I feel the need lately for something to re-energize myself.  Re-motivate.  Re-inspire.  I am not good at asking for things for me.  But I have been asking anyway.  Begging.  Shouting.  Vote for ME.  Do this for ME.  I want something for ME. Those are hard words for me to say.

I’m not even sure why I want this so badly.  I’m not usually a high-falutin’ trip-to-the-big-city kind of gal.  But maybe that’s why I do want to go.  A few days of not being me.  A few days of putting me first.  A few days of saying it is ok to be selfish sometimes.

I have not heeded the advice given during the safety speech they give on an airplane.  “In the event of emergency, put on your oxygen mask first and then help others.” I’ve been trying to help the other passengers while mine is still dangling from the ceiling.  Maybe this trip would help me put my mask on and take a really deep breath.

I don’t think I have much chance of winning since I didn’t even know I was a finalist for about 6 of the 9 eligible voting days.  Especially since I don’t even think I’ve been able to vote for myself since a message keeps popping up that I’ve already voted for the day!  But I do appreciate everyone that has indulged me by voting for me and giving me words of encouragement!

Win or lose, I’m going to watch Real Housewives this week.  And I’m finally going to get my hair cut.  Do I know how to pamper myself or what??

And now you know what’s coming…

Click the link below, second page of stories, vote for Angela M.  🙂

https://www.facebook.com/#!/volispirits/app_489717107739723

Don’t Talk To Strangers. Just Let Them Follow You.

Jake: You have more Twitter followers than I do!!

Me:  And I only know about 5 of them in real life.

Jake: That’s creepy.

Me:  That’s what bloggers want.  To get a whole bunch of people they don’t know to read what they write.

Jake:  Why??

Me:  …Good question…

(So much for the years spent preaching about “stranger danger” and not giving out any personal information on the internet.)

Do as I say, not as I do.

Jolly Old St. Nick-or-Treat

Photo credit: smallbusinessbc.ca

Rescheduling “Trick or Treat, Give Me Something Good To Eat” has proven to be a bit…umm…tricky.

Unfortunately there wasn’t a workable date to transform the event into “Snacksgiving” (I thought that was a little less offensive than calling it “Thanksgivoweenie.”).

I did, however, have a meeting yesterday and am happy to report it will be held in conjunction with a distribution of shoe box filled gifts for Christmas.

It will most likely be held strictly indoors (because I don’t want Mother Nature flubbing things up again!) with some festive decorations and games with the food as “prizes.”  There is a possibility of still trying to incorporate the trunk-or-treat concept.  “Christmas Tree Trunk-or-treat” perhaps.

I’m anxious for this to happen (and to get all the food out of my living room), but for now I suppose I will just have to Ho-Ho-Hold my horses.

Stay tuned…

______________________________________________________________

And my daily PITA reminder:  VOTE, VOTE, VOTE.  Yes, I realize the presidential election is over.  But another important vote is needed.  To help me win a trip to NYC and some schmoozing and boozing and make-over with Melissa Gorga.  Click on the link below, go to the second page of stories and vote for Angela M.

https://www.facebook.com/#!/volispirits/app_489717107739723

The City That Never Sleeps and The Girl That Always Does

It’s a little ironic that I’m trying to get votes to win a trip to the “city that never sleeps” when lately that seems to be all I do.  Fatigue has taken over recently and napping seems to be what fills up all of my spare time.  My 4o winks have been more like 4,000 winks.

Photo: livinlavidazia.com

But if you help me win the trip to NYC, I promise to save all lumbering for when I get home.  I will enjoy every moment of the trip and will blog about every detail so you can re-live it with me!

Have no idea what trip I’m talking about?  You can read about it here…

Want to see me with BIG hair??

Or I can just quickly tell you about it again…

Voli Light Vodka contacted me about a “Housewife Heroes” contest after reading about my posts about my “game plan.”  I’ve been selected as a finalist and now need your votes to win a trip to NYC and lunch including a make-over with Melissa Gorga (Real Housewives of New Jersey) and some other goodies.

I can’t win this without my friends and loyal readers.  Just click the link below and go to the second page for my entry (Angela M) and click the little vote box!  You can click once a day from now through Friday!

https://www.facebook.com/#!/volispirits/app_489717107739723

During all of my naps, I will dream of going to the city that doesn’t sleep.  More irony.

________________________________________________

And don’t forget my…thick.  hair.  Really thick hair.  The real housewife make-over big hair pics will be your grand prize.

Want To See Me With BIG Hair??

Anyone who knew me in the 80s knows I can rock me some big hair.  You can help me get a Jersey girl make-over with Melissa Gorga’s (Real Housewives of New Jersey) make-up artist.  You can also help me get a trip to NYC, including lunch with Melissa, as well as some other fun goodies.  I’m one of 10 finalists for the Voli Light Vodka’s Housewives Hero contest.  And I need your vote!

Just click this link, go to the second page of stories and vote for my story (Angela M).  I will be eternally grateful.  No, I’m serious.  I will!

https://www.facebook.com/#!/volispirits/app_489717107739723

I’ve never been to NYC so I’m shamelessly begging for votes.  And I’ve only been on 2 trips without kids in the past 16 years!  Feeling sorry enough for me yet to click the link and vote? 😉

Not feeling pity?  Well how about curiosity?  If I win, I will post many photos of me with some majorly big make-over hair.  I have super thick hair so when I say big, I mean BIG.  No “bump it” help needed here. That should be plenty of incentive to want to help me win.

Unfortunately I’m starting out at a disadvantage because voting began almost a week ago, but I just got notified today.  Go figure.  But I’m hoping my friends and readers will come through for me and vote every day (yes, I will be a pain in the butt until Friday.  I apologize in advance.).

As a teaser, here’s a glimpse into the big hair era.  And this was the 90s.  You will just have to imagine how big the 80s look was.  Unless I win, of course.  Then you will see it first hand.

And my best “Real Housewives” impersonation…with Jim “The Situation”

Go big, or stay home.  I want to go big.

Please vote!  🙂

________________________________________________________

My kids totally burst my bubble when they saw those photos.  “That’s YOU Mom??  You look nothing like that now.”  I wanted to say “Yeah, that was before YOU gave me grey hair and wrinkles.”  😉  BUT…with a make-over by Melissa Gorga’s make-up artist…

Catch-44

Photo: intuit.com

Most of my writing is about my kids, yet I don’t have time to write because of my kids.

Since I have 4 kids, I didn’t call this post a catch-22.  Catch-44 seemed, well, catchier.

I missed my shot with “My Life Is A Sitcom” because I swear the writers from some current sitcoms are peeping in my windows for their ideas.  I just wish I could consistently write my own “sitcom” more often.  I really do enjoy writing my blog and I know consistency is best for my readers.  But time restraints keep getting in the way.

Honestly though, time isn’t my only hindrance. I’ve become quite obsessed with wanting to know how many people are actually reading my blog.  Very obsessed, actually.  Pathetic, I know.   It is causing a mental block that is making me write less.

To get more people to read, I need to write more, yet I can’t write more because of wondering how many people are reading.

Another catch-22.  Or catch-55.

But that will have to be another blog topic.  I don’t have time right now. 😉

My life is a paradox.  And sometimes a parody.

Mc-BOO-n-isms

I pride myself on being pretty brave with spookiness at Halloween, but as I reached in this bin to grab a decoration that was under some costume capes, I was turned into a total scaredy cat!

What do you think had me so terrorized???

No, it wasn’t the monster hand below the decoration that frightened me.

It was something

much,

much,

much,

much scarier.

The not-so-scaredy cat, Mushu, wasn’t startled at all.  He was just annoyed that I woke him.  That’ll teach me to make sure it is JUST black capes before I stick my hand in next time…

________________________________________________

Filed under the “things I never thought I’d have to say” category…

“Don’t hit your brother with the cat!!!!!”

Don’t worry, it isn’t Mushu.

________________________________________________

Mushu may not have been afraid when I reached in the bin, but I think he met his match.

Mushu was happy I used my crappy camera phone so you all can’t see the terror in his eyes.

________________________________________________

Brownie really enjoyed this scratch behind the ears.

She just didn’t know it was going to cost an arm and a leg.

She still owes us the leg.

________________________________________________

Speaking of the arm, it mysteriously shows up in the weirdest places in our house.  And no one ever claims responsibility for moving it.  It’s a little disturbing…

But you know what is MORE disturbing??  That my children think it is acceptable to throw their sports crap equipment all over the floor.

________________________________________________

Notice anything unusual in this “Trunk or Treat” photo?  No, not the flying white witch.  Or the giant cockroach.  Or the freaky looking face to the left of Greg (although I don’t remember that being there when I took the photo…hmm…).  Check out Eric’s “bag” for collecting his candy.

Yes, it is an empty Chefboyardee ravioli box.  Not decorated, not disguised, not even tucked in flaps.  Just a ravioli box.

________________________________________________

Every year we forget to carve our pumpkin.  So we are always frantically scooping out pumpkin guts as the trick-or-treaters are arriving.  This year Greg saved the day and did the pumpkin all by himself (well, with a little help from Dad on the sharp stuff) before the trick-or-treaters arrived.

________________________________________________

For a work event, Jim had to show off his baking skills by bringing in a Halloween themed dessert. He found this fun idea that he thought seemed simple enough.  I should have warned him that anything on Martha Stewart’s website is never as easy as it looks.

Photo: marthastewart.com

He could only find regular waffle cones (not chocolate) and regular Twizzlers (not string licorice), but assembled the rest of the ingredients.  He worked into the wee hours of the morning and was pretty happy with his results.  Until he had the following conversation with Greg…

Greg: What are those supposed to be?

Jim: What do you think they are supposed to be?

Greg: Ummmm…Snowmen?

So much for the MartyStewart.com idea.

________________________________________________

What was the most terrifying thing I saw this Halloween season, you may ask?  This teenage girl who was obviously bewitched by Jake.  Eeeeeek.

________________________________________________

I always loved the “spot the differences” game.  Comment with the differences YOU can find!

Hint: There are 47.

________________________________________________

Don’t be afraid of missing a new post!  Sign up for email notification (top right corner)!