Category Archives: Humor

Gangham Style, Happiness, Humor, Latest News, News, Psy, Uncategorized, Viral Sensation, Youtube

Gangnam Style – Viral Sensation or Viral Infestation?

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I was so excited about the increased views of my blog since being Freshly Pressed.  Views of my blog have been coming in by the thousands.  Well, sometimes the thousand.  And other times the hundreds.  But I’m an internet sensation, or at least a WordPress sensation.  Right?  Oh, what’s that you say?  “Thousands” means nothing on the internet?  The latest viral sensation on youtube right now has 131 MILLION views and climbing??  Oh.  Wow.  That must one absolutely EXCEPTIONAL video to get that much attention.  Phenomenal, remarkable, surpassing all expectations!   I MUST go watch this.

GANGNAM STYLE VIDEO: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9bZkp7q19f0_ (For the 47 people that haven’t already seen it.)

Photo credit www.facebook.com/OFFICIALPSY

Wow, I was right.  That IS one EXCEPTIONAL video.  I just had the wrong definition of exceptional.  Peculiar, abnormal, nothing I would ever expect to see!  I think I will refer to the singer as Psy-cho.  The video is full of bizarre outfits and scenarios.  One of my favorite is the fake explosion with the person nearby jumping out of the way.  Unfortunately, they jump out of the way about 5 seconds AFTER the explosion.  Amazingly, they seemed unharmed. Another scene shows Psy sitting on the toilet.  Lovely.  Psy supposedly popularizes a “new” dance called “riding the horse.”   Sorry, but Will and Carlton dancing to “Jump On It” on the Fresh Prince of Bel Air show comes to mind.  Now that is rad.

Photo credit www.businessinsider.com

JUMP ON IT video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N7h-2UmHuxQ   (For the 131 million that are too young to have seen that episode.)

Now for the confession.  I can’t get this “exceptional” song out of my brain.  Please.  Get.  It.  Out.  Of.  My.  Head.  I have been singing it over and over (and over and over) all day long.  I even re-watched the video.  Twice.  Alright, alright.  I admit it.  I’m listening to it as I type this.  For me, it isn’t a viral sensation.  It is a viral infestation.  I can’t rid my mind of it.

“Oppan Gangnam Style” is the full title of the song, which translates as “your big brother is Gangnam Style.”  The best part of this craze is “Umma Gangnam Style” or “Mom is Gangnam style.”  Middle aged woman steps up to the challenge.  No, she one-ups!  This Mom has some serious moves while dancing to Psy’s song.  I saw somewhere that the Mom is 60, but I am inclined to believe that was written by a teenager who thinks anyone over the ago of 30 is “60.”  If she really IS 60, I want her secret.

Photo credit to www.dailypicksandflicks.com

UMMA GANGNAM STYLE video:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HDJXgiUe_EM)

The Umma video “only” has 4 million+ views but deserves as many as the original version in my opinion.  That Mom, that Umma – now SHE is a sensation.  You go Mom!

Just what IS it about this song that makes it so “exceptional??”  I think it is the outrageous factor.  And possibly some sublimal messages that make it impossible to stop thinking and talking about.  If that is what is required to go “viral,” I think I’m out of luck.  There is no way my brain could come up with something that outlandishly memorable.

So, for now, I will enjoy writing in my little part of the internet, millions of views or not.  While I listen to Gangnam Style.  Again.

Time to call an exterminator. 

Happiness, Humor, Life, Uncategorized

Blogging For Idiots

Text conversation after I discovered Jim’s accidental post on my blog (see “Publish = Blog Entry, Not Comment” for the story).
Me:  You have made me laugh for the past hour.  You MUST read my new blog entry.  It is an explanation of “my” blog entry from this morning.
Jim: OK, but I have that look of horror on my face again.
Me: You should. Let’s just say I found your “comment.”  And so did the rest of the blogging world.  Go to momopolize.com to read it…NOT wordpress.com.
Jim (after reading blog): Does that make me a blogger?
Me:  Sure.  You are now a blogger.
Jim: Yeah!  Maybe I’ll get that book deal.  Blogging for idiots.

__________________________________________

Sorry, Jim.  Looks like it’s not in the cards for you.  Maybe “Commenting for Idiots?”

(photo from nulledtemplates.com)

Happiness, Humor, Life

Publish = Blog Entry, Not Comment

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Important warning to all bloggers:  One must be sure to log out of WordPress on husband’s computer when finished.  Or one may find a new mysterious blog entry next time one logs on.

My husband, Jim, finally decided to read Momopolize.  “Gee honey, it only took you 3 weeks.  Thanks.”  Oops.  I forgot, I promised to play nice.  I meant “Gee honey, you took the time to read 3 weeks of blogs in one day.  Thanks!!”  After reading, he decided to post a complimentary comment about my new blog.  Only he didn’t post a comment.  He put his comment as a new blog post.  And PUBLISHED it.  For the world to see.  So for everyone who viewed the new blog entry from earlier today titled “I hope no…”, now you have an explanation.  I’m sure you’ve been wracking your brain all day trying to figure out the mystery.

At least now I know I’m not the most technologically challenged person in the family.

This was Jim’s “comment” blog entry seen ’round the world.

“I hope no one sees how long I’ve been reading this. I never realized how much I miss of my own family. What an interesting time from 2:30pm to 6:00pm each week day. I know I don’t say it enough, but thank you for all you do! Love you.”

I hope this dispels any rumors that I am narcissistic for posting my immense appreciation and love for myself.

Honey, repeat this 3 times:  Don’t click “add new post.”  Ever.  Thanks for the kind comment though.  I really do appreciate it.  And for giving me my laugh for the day.  And material.  Lots of material for my blog.  Writing my blog is easy.  I simply regurgitate the antics of my family!

I’m not really a writer. I just play one in real life.

Happiness, Humor, Life, Parent, Parenting, Uncategorized

Tales of a Tattle

Greg: “Eric called me a snitch.”
Me (to Greg): “Just tell him that’s not nice.”
Me (to Jim): “He is snitching about being called a snitch.  Do you see the irony here??”
A minute later…
Greg: “Now he called me a tattle-tale for telling that he called me a snitch.”
Jim:   “Greg, what is the definition of a tattle-tale?”
Greg: “Someone who tells on someone else that isn’t doing something very bad.”
Me:    “And what are you doing now?”
Greg: “…oopsie…”
_________________________________________
  • Greg: “I’m going to go play Jake’s PS3.”
  • Me:    “Did Jake say it is ok?”
  • Greg: “Yes, he owes me time because he punched me but I didn’t tell.”
  • Me:   “Well…you kinda’ just did.”
Happiness, Humor, Life, Parent, Parenting, Uncategorized

Brother, can you spare a dime? Or quarter?

  • Me: “So did you and Greg decide to switch chores?”
  • Eric: “No.”
  • Me: “But I’ve seen Greg feeding the pets a lot recently”
  • Eric: “I know.  I give him a quarter to do it.”
  • Me: “But we pay you more than a quarter.”
  • Eric: “I know.”
  • Me: “So you pay him PART of what we pay you, and he does it??”
  • Eric: “Not exactly.  I usually find a quarter he left lying around and just give him the same one again.”

(7/30/12)

Happiness, Homework, Humor, Labor Day, Life, organization, Parent, Parenting, School, Uncategorized

Welcome, Day of Sweet Repose

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Yes, officially it may be Labor Day.  A day intended to celebrate work and also the symbolic end of summer.  However, for me today is a day to recover from the first week of school, and to mourn the end of summer.

The first week of school is really tough.  Adjusting to rising early, making a good impression on the new teachers, getting all the homework done.  No, not the kids.  ME!

The horrid beeping of the dreaded alarm aside, the first week is full of assignments for the parents.  This early in the year, I’m still trying to give the illusion that I have it all together.  By the end of the year, it is unquestionably apparent that I do not, but I start out each year using slight of hand tricks to cover the truth.

Monday started out well.  I got all 4 of the dreaded “first day packets” filled out.  It even seemed less time consuming this year.  Maybe after 12 years, I’m finally getting it.  I even filled out the “describe your child” sheet for Eric, which I find extremely difficult.  “Five adjectives that best describe your child.”  OK Miss Teacher, do you want me to describe my child or really describe my child?

Abrasive, Combative, Volatile, Obnoxious and Selfish.  No, that’s is how his brothers would describe him.

Argumentative, Whiny, Defiant, Forgetful, Lazy.  No, that’s only when asked to do chores.

Brilliant, Enchanting, Enthusiastic, Responsible, Dazzling.  No, too kiss up.

Kind, Bright, Funny, Happy, Stubborn.  Simple, with a negative thrown in for a reality check.  Bingo.

Truthfully, I don’t remember which adjectives I ended up using.  I know stubborn stayed.  The rest were probably barely legible because I changed my mind so much I almost erased right through the paper.  Immediately I put the paperwork in the kids’ backpacks to be returned the next day.  Put one in the win column.

Eric came home Tuesday with all the papers still in his folder, exactly where I had proudly placed them.  Are you kidding me??  “Teacher, teacher, I did my homework.  I did it all.  I did my best.  But…my dog ate it?  Well, my kid ate it.  Or forgot to turn it in.  Something like that.”  Come on Eric.  Let me look good past the SECOND day of school!

One of my other homework tasks for Eric’s class is to sign his agenda every day.         Simple enough.  Illegible initials in the signature box.  Check.  On Thursday I notice – in bid red letters – a note from the teacher.  A note that was written on TUESDAY.  In addition to not turning in my homework, he didn’t turn in his time capsule.  Apparently I’m not JUST supposed to sign the agenda.  I’m supposed to actually READ it first.  Maybe the teacher needs to add flashing lights and sirens next time.

In the backpack the time capsule went, to be turned in first thing Friday.

Sigh.  First homework assignment 3 days late.

Friday afternoon I notice an envelope on the couch.  That looks similar to that troublesome time capsule envelope.  No way.  Are you kidding me??  No, really.  Someone must be messing with me.

Sigh.  First homework assignment 4 days late.

If it actually gets there tomorrow.

Trying to keep the illusion going this year is going to require some smoke and mirrors. And maybe a rabbit. 

Happiness, Humor, Life, Uncategorized

Karma’s only a b**** when you are

We refer to Karma a lot in our house.  Usually in a bad way.

“You called your brother stupid and then forgot to study for a test?  Karma.”

“You left your skateboard propped against the wall after I told you not to and it fell on your toe?  Karma.”

This past week, I had spent a lot of time being a really nice person.  Really nice.  Yes, I’m patting myself on the back.  I enjoy fostering kittens but it has been overwhelming recently and has required more effort than normal.  Adoption events, meeting a rescue transport last minute because a group of kittens was scheduled to be euthanized, and, more recently, many vet visits because the poor little baby kittens are ill.  The past few days I have had to hand feed kitten milk “formula” every few hours with a syringe.  Also last week I agreed to spend many hours doing a strenuous task at work that everyone else (who knew better) didn’t want to do.  Today, as I’m on hold with the rescue’s vet (which is about 45 minutes away) trying to schedule yet another appointment (because, despite all my effort, the kittens weren’t improving), all I could think was “when it rains, it pours!”  I was already having a little pity party for myself because I had to be late for a picnic in order to make a trip home just to pick up a kitten (not one of the sick ones).  I begrudgingly agreed to deliver him to his adopter during the time I should have been at the picnic because it was the only time she was available, even though it wasn’t convenient for me.

When loading up the kitten for his adoption meeting, Jimmy went down into the basement and informed us that there was a funny noise.  Jim went to investigate and realized a pipe had burst.  It had JUST burst.  The wall was wet but it hadn’t even made it to the carpeted floor yet.  Jim turned off the water and averted disaster.

“You kindly missed part of your picnic to help a rescued foster kitten find his forever home and then your basement didn’t flood?  Karma.”

Shortly after we arrived to the picnic, it started raining.  Yep, when it rains, it pours.  But better that the pouring was outside at a picnic instead of in our basement.  Thanks Karma.

I had to leave the picnic early to make it to the vet appointment, but that’s ok.  I’ll just expect another visit from Karma.

_______________________________________________________________

(The two itty-bitty-under-a-pound-in-weight kittens had to stay at the vet overnight because they are so ill.  Poor, sweet little guys.  I’m waiting to get an update on them any moment now.  Hey Karma, I will take that next visit now!!)

Happiness, Humor, Life, Parenting, Uncategorized

Lost control of the remote control

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That awkward moment when you realize the kids have left the room and you are watching Spongebob alone.

And you still don’t change the channel.

  • “No Patrick, they are laughing next to us.” ~Spongebob
  • “It may be stupid, but it’s also dumb.” ~Patrick
  • Sandy: “Patrick, don’t you have to be stupid somewhere else?” Patrick: “Not until 4.”
  • “That’s it.  You just lost your brain priveleges.” ~Plankton
  • “As long as these pants are square and this sponge is Bob, I will not let you down.”~Spongebob
  • “I’m a goofy goober, yeah.  You’re a goofy goober, yeah.  We’re all goofy goobers, yeah.” ~Spongebob and Patrick

See???  It’s good stuff!

Happiness, Humor, Latest News, Life, News, Parenting, Uncategorized

Once In Two Blue Moons

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Bummer.  I just realized that tonight is the rare second full moon of the month.  The Blue Moon.  I missed out on doing all those things I always say I do once in a…well, you get it.  Now I have to wait 3 more years to do them!

Since I get manicures once in a blue moon, I guess the Caviar Mani isn’t in the cards for me.  I’m sure that trend will be gone by 2015.  On the bright side, I guess I’m also off the hook for cleaning my windows

.I tried explaining what a blue moon is to Greg, but as soon as he heard the words “Blue” and “Moon,” he yelled “So the SMURFS are coming tonight???”  Oh Greg, get your facts straight buddy.  The Smurfs didn’t COME to the Big Apple during a blue moon.  They get to go back to Smurfville tonight.  What Greg?  No, it’s not an actual big apple.  That’s what people call New Yor…oh, nevermind.  I feel like I should come up with a witty explanation.  But I am only clever once in a blue moon.

Since I missed my opportunity tonight, I guess for the next 3 years I need to change the saying to “once in two blue moons.”